Reflection Point – Are you really listening?

The most impactful leaders I have worked with, at all levels of organisations, are excellent listeners.  It’s a standout quality and one that I don’t see often.

Listening is not really something we ever learn formally. And yet, it’s an incredibly powerful tool that we can leverage as leaders for the people all around us and as humans for those we love the most.

Oscar Trimboli is an Australian Executive Coach, presenter, author and host of the award-winning “Deep Listening” podcast, one of the few podcasts I really enjoy listening to.  He talks about the 5 levels of listening for deep listening; self; content; context; unsaid and meaning – that guide us toward deeper, more impactful conversations.

Applying the five levels of listening starts with managing the noise in your own head.  This is the first level – it’s all about listening to yourself – becoming aware of your internal state and clearing mental distractions; critical for effective meetings and conversations.

Our heads can be noisy places, and the struggle to stay focussed on conversations is a common one.  Oscar talks about this in one of his podcasts; how you can never listen to the other person fully because “you’re listening to the story that you’re telling yourself in your own head. You’re telling yourself a story about the past, the present, the future. You might be telling yourself a story about how you don’t get on with this person. So you’re already disconnected from your ability to listen”.  Interested in hearing more?  You can listen to this episode about the 5 levels of listening here.

Sound at all familiar?

As you end your week, take a few minutes to consider the following reflection questions.

Question 2

What supports you to be present and focussed in meetings and conversations, and clear the distractions?

Question 3

What impact does your listening have on others?